I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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