I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
