i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
