Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
