I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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