If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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