..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
