Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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