if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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