Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
