it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
