Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
