I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
