Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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