i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
