new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
