i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
