On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
false alarm, still single
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
