Banned from zoo.
Again?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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