i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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