And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
We had sex on a dog bed..
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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