am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
