The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
