I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize