I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
