But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
as a side note pls kill me
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize