I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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