I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
