sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I think my fart just growled at me.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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