Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize