I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
