It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize