hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
