Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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