READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
