Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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