some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
