Do you still have your period?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
