But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
