is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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