We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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