She's JV to your varsity
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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