oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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