You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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