So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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