I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
We named our party play list daddy issues
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
