Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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