I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
should my penis look like a turkey
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
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