escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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