lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
